Live the way you want!

There comes a time in everyone’s life where one meets a stalemate situation and has no idea how to get out of all the troubles that are happening only and only to him .You look around, and see everyone is happy and think-WHY NOT ME! Then you do some introspection and end up with the conclusion that after all, the problem lies within me and the way I am living my life and that I must try changing it a little bit. You start reading some books and do some self-improvement activities that helps you escape from your real self.  Does it work? Is it the right thing to do after all- to blame yourself and rely on books and motivational movies?

It feels so great to read something that tells us as to how should we be living our lives? Easy, isn’t it? You get tailor made solutions! What usually happens after reading? Let us see. In the beginning, it gives you immense motivation and the hope that you are capable of changing yourself and your life for better. You follow the new suggested “theory” that guarantees a better life, provided, you give your precious time to the new “theory” which has claimed to have changed people’s lives. These days, even I am in one of these phase where in I am trying to understand and explore some “theories” that might help me to understand myself and my life better. This is what happened to me, I followed the “theory” religiously with all faith in it, but then all that sincerity just faded away. It happens every time! It fades away within a month, a week, a day and sometimes the moment I am done reading such a philosophical book and put it down. Why does that happen? Why does this feeling follow us all through our lives? Why can’t we be just happy with what we have and are capable of?

The other day I was watching this movie “Tuesdays with Morrie”- adapted from a book written by Mitch Albom with the same title. It has got some of the most simple and best dialogues which tell you so many things in just about a single sentence. One of my favourite is when Morrie says “Why always be first-What’s wrong in being second?”How great it would be if all the people had the same thinking! Don’t you think all this frustration in life and WITH life comes from the fact that everyone is a part of the rat race! Everyone is just striving themselves and throwing themselves into the deep sea of stress, frustration and eventually disappointment. I would not deny the fact that somewhere even I was a part of this. But now after a bit of introspection, fortunately, I have decided to stay on the shore and enjoy my life. I don’t want to get drowned in this sea where in all I get, is suffocation. Instead I understand my capability and incapability, and do things without any expectation, because it’s the only way you can always avoid being disappointed.  The most unexpected thing happened after exploring all the self-improvement activities -- and it is that I realised one thing and I believe in that now- That in no way I can follow nor do I need to have a life-map giving me directions and instructions on how to live, and how to behave, how not to be angry ever and how to keep calm every time. For if I start doing all of that- I would not be a HUMAN anymore. Having said that, I don’t really mean that all the self-improvement activities are useless. NO! They do help in certain ways-like making you feel that after all there is a solution to every problem and the fact that life can be pretty interesting and good if perceived rightly. It gives you perception and a faith in life. No doubt about that. It’s just that you don’t have to follow each and everything that has been suggested by the “theories”. Well of course you can try some of them, but I am sure it won’t last much- for we human are not programmed to function that way. If you are able to follow it strictly, then please do accept my salute to your determination. But then, wouldn’t it get kind of robotic! I mean how can you not show anger and smile instead when you actually are burning red with anger! It just sounds so impossible and almost not human like. However this doesn’t mean that we have got the license to get angry on each and every small thing. Some people are born with the skill of controlling anger, some are not. So the point being is everyone is different.  You can’t do much about your inherent characteristic though, but then there is always a scope for improvement that comes with self realisation, which is hard to get by sitting and reading some self-improvement book. You need to experience your own bad traits in order for the self realisation and to understand that there is a scope of improvement.

No one has to change himself for the sake of it, don’t have to live the life for the sake of it, don’t have to take lot of pressure to be the best RAT in the lot. Instead he can live life peacefully and work towards changing it only and only if he really feels the need to, change it for adding quality to life, No one has to be the best student, best daughter, best friend, best wife, best husband or whatever just for the sake of being FIRST in the race. Strive for it only if you feel it, only if you want to do it. Don’t study to just PASS in exams, study to add some quality in your life, some perception to your life and eventually to add some happiness to your life. Always remember there is someone who is always ahead of you, so stop running for the finish line, instead run - to enjoy the journey.

Live the life-the way you want! or say...FEEL the life – the way u want!